By sharon on Dec 6, 2008 (Yep, an oldie that's getting assimilated into this blog! My boys are 23 and 25 now, but the sentiments in this blog are ageless!)
My boys are 22 and 24 years old now. When I moved into my new house in October, they moved in too! It just happened to be a time in all of our lives that we were able to make that move together. Coincidence? Hardly. I don’t even believe in coincidences anymore. I’m far more inclined to believe that God has a hand in every little tiny thing that happens in my life.
In the beginning of the house building stages, I had talked to Aaron, my oldest, about moving in with my grandson Noah. We decided to turn the basement into an apartment for them, and they would just rent it from me. It was a wonderful idea, and still is. I’m so happy that we did it. Chris, my youngest, happened to separate from his wife about a month or so before the house was done, and I didn’t have another apartment for rent, but I did have a large bedroom. So after a few negotiations, he was in too.
It may be a little uncommon for kids their age to be so willing to move home with mom. I’m not sure. But God has certainly blessed me with boys that love their momma. And I can’t begin to thank Him enough at this point in my life to have that kind of relationship with them, and to have their willingness for them to be here with me when I need them so much. The truth is, I didn’t even realize how much I did need them. And it’s not just for doing the things I can’t do either. In fact, that’s a very small part of it. I want to share with you a tiny little thing that might describe the real reason that I need them so much now.
This morning, I could hear them both downstairs puttering around and getting ready for work. This in itself always makes me smile. Even if I don’t see them much in a day, just knowing they’re around makes me so happy. Anyway, this morning … I hear them getting ready to go, and soon I hear Aaron say “Hey, I love you brother” and a few seconds after.. “I love you too brother” and then “will you start my truck?” and “yeah, I’ll start it. I’m on my way out now”.
This may seem like nothing to all of you. But to me, while it's nothing new, they have been close like this forever, it was huge. But it's worth telling you about it, because it reminded me of something.
Back when I still thought I had cancer and was going to be dead in less than 200 days, it actually crossed my mind that I would have nothing to leave my boys. I don’t know why I was so worried about having something physical or monetary to give them, but it was something I couldn’t help but think about for awhile. This morning, I realized something very important, and I’m bawling my eyes out as I type this. I have given those two boys everything they need for when I’m gone. They know the most important thing there is to know.. How to love each other. That’s all they need, because their love for each other, and their love for me is enough to build on. It’s the strong kind of love that you need to learn to love everything else that’s important. They both have sons of their own now, and I know that their love for their own children is a result of loving each other first. I don't take full credit for their ability to love. My sons have had the best teachers in the world! Their grandparents, their aunts and uncles, their extended family, and their father. But I WILL take credit for a huge part of it. I'm selfish like that!
Today was important because I needed to be reminded that they don’t wait for special occasions to say “I love you” and to do things for each other. Something about knowing this is so comforting for me.
Today, no matter how badly I hurt, and no matter how stinkin hard it is to walk down the stairs the first time, I will hardly even notice! God has reminded me of my own importance yet again, and if He's not careful, I'm going to get a big head! These are the things that keep me going. These are the things that make me strong.
Today I’m thanking God for reminding me of what I DO have to give. For what I’ve already been given too. I am so blessed! I am, indeed, the luckiest person on the face of this earth.
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